With the holiday season upon us, people across the globe are preparing for family gatherings and holiday parties with both excitement and anxiety. For families impacted by addiction, there is an additional challenge that plagues party plans and guest lists. Do you invite that person? Will they be sober? Will they over-indulge and create drama? Will other people be upset if you invite them? If they come, do you serve alcohol or not? As an addiction psychologist with 20 years of experience providing evidence-based therapy, these questions flood my sessions when the holidays approach.
When someone close to you struggles with problematic substance use or addiction, the holiday tension can be palpable and overwhelming. Here are some things to consider about how to navigate holiday festivities when addiction is part of the picture.
Let your values guide you instead of your fears.
Many people struggle with whether or not to invite those who are dealing with addiction, particularly if previous experiences have been turbulent. I encourage people to let their values influence holiday decisions more than their fears. That doesn’t mean that you should invite disaster to your holiday gatherings, but you can consider appropriate precautions for health and safety. Sometimes, it simply isn’t safe to invite someone, but if your primary reason for excluding someone is based on fear that could be exaggerated, you may want to reconsider implementing appropriate boundaries and precautions instead of outright excluding the person.